for Izzy

i did a push up with you on my back at a house i'd never been to before 

at the end of the night you thanked me for coming

you said it meant a lot to your friend who was my friend too

you were his best fried and first friend in florida

you brought tres leches to his house one time for desert

we ate it and liked it and criticized it

you brought your roommate and i thought he was smart and your boyfriend

it was raining that night, i remember 

many details about you, even though we only met twice 

i want to keep the parts of you i found nice alive in this world

because this world always needs more nice things

and i want to be a necessary force in this world until i don't need to be anymore and

when im at another house for the first time i will attempt a pull up with you wrapped around my back

things i found buried in the sand at st. simon's beach in georgia in june of 2021

half a peanut shell

a folded band-aid

our feet at that moment youre standing still and a wave goes over them and water starts to recede

not love

you used to live within memory

it contained images you could touch

the way she touched you

it contained you 

most of the time, 

and that one time

i brought you dried mango

i know you'll like it

because it's not too much of anything

music that sounds like that

like the future

a past holding the best to come

it would feel different if you touched me again

none of your skin cells would be the same as last time we met

you would smell different

but maybe wear one of the same t-shirts

now im imagining something extremely different 

something that maybe you'll be like someday

we wont't know each other

it will be new

and boring maybe

good to each other