hey

who are you?

what are you trying so desperately to be?

it’s doomed and pathetic

and sometimes even sad to see:

you find elation

one day out of thirteen

struggle you struggle me struggle weeeeee — 

goes your head

but remember!

you’ll never be the best 
at anything

tho keep trying anyway 
to create your world 
of colors and sounds and sweat

and don't forget to love the real world

of rivers and black bears and death

inside my dark room

today it felt better to sit in my dark room than to open the blinds
though it is harder to see and harder to perform the simple tasks
it is easier to focus
on the the computer screen, the sounds from my speakers
in the dark
it is easier to hide
and forget about the hollow in my gut and the vast bright world
behind the blinds